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Newsletter Issue 53

Every few weeks, I ask one question to a founder, CEO, manager, or business owner I respect…

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The Heartbeat Podcast: A chat with Dr. Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler, Ph. D.

It’s my true pleasure to welcome conflict expert, Dr. Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler, Ph. D., to the Heartbeat podcast today. As the Founder + CEO of Alignment Strategies Groups, Dr. Goldman-Wetzler has worked with leaders and teams at global corporations and nonprofits, including IBM, Intel, Barclays, Oxfam America and the United Nations. Most recently she wrote the book, “Optimal Outcomes” (which comes out on the 25th!) detailing strategies for freeing yourself from conflict. I was delighted to get to chat with her. We discussed leaders’ ideal values vs. shadow values, the role that emotions play in conflict, and the steps we can take to extricate ourselves from conflict in the workplace.

Listen to the podcast and read the transcript of the interview here.

❤️ If you’ve been enjoying The Heartbeat podcast, it’d mean the world to me if you wrote us a review on iTunes. The more reviews we have, the more we’re able to share all our lessons from leaders. Thank you! 🙏

Have an upcoming one-on-one meeting?

Here are 5 essential reads from the KYT blog to start with…

How to prepare for a one-on-one meeting as a manager
“You’re not prepared. Or at least that’s what employees think when it comes to one-on-one meetings. In a recent survey we conducted of 1,182 managers and 838 employees, we found 36% of employees believe their manager is only “somewhat prepared” – and 40% of employees think their manager is “not prepared” or “not prepared at all.””

Stop asking these 4 questions during your one-on-one meetings
“If you’re wondering why your one-on-one meetings tend to feel unfruitful, these questions might be the culprit.”

The 5 mistakes you’re likely making in your one-on-one meetings with direct reports
“Don’t waste your time. Make sure you’re getting the most out of your one-on-one meetings with your direct reports.”

The 8 best questions to ask during a one-on-one meeting
“What should you put on your next one-on-one meeting agenda? These one-on-one meeting questions should be a part of every manager’s toolkit.”

You’ve got your first one-on-one meeting with an employee: How to prepare?
“If you’re a new manager, here are the exact one-on-one meeting questions, agenda template, and approach you can take for your first one-on-one meeting with an employee.”

🌟 How do you consistently ensure your one-on-one meetings are effective? Use our One-on-Ones Tool in Know Your Team 😀 We give you hundreds of one-on-one meeting questions, agenda templates, all based on best practices from our research. See for yourself and check out Know Your Team today

What I’ve been reading lately

The Little Things That Make Employees Feel Appreciated
“Our discussions surfaced notable gaps between managers’ and employees’ perceptions. First, there was a stark difference between how much managers appreciated employees and how appreciated employees felt. We speculate that the illusion of transparency, or people’s tendency to overestimate how visible their emotions are to others, explains this: Managers incorrectly assumed employees knew how they felt about them.” Written by Kerry Roberts Gibson, Kate O’Leary, Joseph R. Weintraub, Harvard Business Review

Take a Wrecking Ball to Your Company’s Iconic Practices
“An organization’s cultural values can thwart needed changes as the business enters a “what got you here won’t get you there” inflection point, such as the digital disruption currently experienced by many incumbent companies. As the examples below illustrate, cultural change requires — and can be accelerated by — eliminating or radically transforming practices that reinforce the old mindsets and behaviors a company is trying to shift.” Written by Herminia Ibarra, MIT Management Review

Understanding the leader’s ‘identity mindtrap’: Personal growth for the C-suite
“Unlike our earliest changes, however, development in our adult lives doesn’t tend to show up physically or even in terms of what we know. Instead, we can see it most easily in how people make sense of what they know. Academic research highlights four such stages—or forms of mind—of potential development.3 We move from one to another sequentially, growing new forms of mind much as a tree grows new rings. And like tree rings, our older ways of making sense of the world do not vanish but remain within us, where they may, occasionally and unbidden, shape our behavior.” Written by Jennifer Garvey Berger and Zafer Gedeon Achi, McKinsey Quarterly

The hidden source of workplace stress you’re overlooking
“A rude email isn’t just a forgettable “blip on [the] workday radar… It has a cumulative negative effect for both workers and their families,” says Park, a professor of labor and employment relations at U of I. To reach this conclusion, Park and her co-author Verena Haun of Johannes Gutenberg University surveyed 167 dual-earner couples at multiple times during a work week: right before the weekend, the following Monday morning, and the end of the next new week.” Published in EAB Daily Briefing

An interesting read…

Emotionally Extreme Experiences, Not Just “Positive” or “Negative” Experiences, Are More Meaningful in Life
What makes life meaningful? Recent research suggests extremity, rather than valence, of experience matters most. I found this incredibly intriguing.

Join me for “How to Create a Culture of Feedback” Workshop Live! on 2/20 at 2PM PT

🌟 You want the truth. Not the sugar-coated version. The real truth. But, how do you get it? In this 60 minute online live session, I’ll personally share our Know Your Team framework for how to create a culture of feedback – with a specific emphasis on asking and receiving feedback – based on our methodology developed over the past 6 years working with 15,000+ people. While we typically only offer these Workshop Live! sessions to KYT customers, we’re opening up this session to the public. Register for free here.

Support what we do

❤️ If you’ve been enjoying these newsletters and interviews over the past few months (or years!), it’d mean the world to me if you wrote us a review on iTunes. The more reviews we have, the more we’re able to share all our lessons from leaders… And, the more we can keep researching, writing, and sharing the work we do. Thank you for lending your support! 🙏

Written by Claire Lew

CEO of Canopy. My mission in life is to help people become happier at work. Say hi to me on Twitter at @clairejlew.