{"id":514,"date":"2017-07-11T00:55:04","date_gmt":"2017-07-11T00:55:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/danielvlopes238992071.wordpress.com\/2017\/07\/11\/why-you-should-argue-with-your-employees-and-embrace-internal-team-conflict\/"},"modified":"2024-10-11T12:28:18","modified_gmt":"2024-10-11T19:28:18","slug":"why-you-should-argue-with-your-employees-and-embrace-internal-team-conflict","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/canopy.is\/blog\/2017\/07\/11\/why-you-should-argue-with-your-employees-and-embrace-internal-team-conflict\/","title":{"rendered":"Why you should argue with your employees and embrace internal team conflict"},"content":{"rendered":"

Yes, it can feel draining and counterproductive, but here\u2019s why arguing and dealing with team conflict can be good\u00a0things\u2026<\/h4>\n
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\u201cDid I hire the wrong person?\u201d<\/p>\n

I remember thinking that right after I\u2019d gotten into a heated argument with one of our team members here at Canopy<\/a>.<\/p>\n

This was back in 2014. We\u2019d recently hired this person, and few weeks into his time with us, I disagreed with how he was handling our support requests. He’d replied quickly to a few CEOs\u2026 but in my opinion, it was too<\/em> quick. I didn\u2019t think he\u2019d answered their concerns thoroughly enough. We ended up arguing about what was more important in customer service: speed or quality.<\/p>\n

Man, it was frustrating. To feel like your teammate is not on the same page as you. To feel the tug, the push, the pull, the back-and-forth of opinions. We got into it. No yelling or name-calling or anything\u2026 but it was an intense exchange.<\/p>\n

At the time, I thought: \u201cUh oh.\u201d If we\u2019re arguing this early on in our time together, maybe this wasn\u2019t going to work out. Were we irreparably incompatible? Perhaps I shouldn\u2019t have even hired him, in the first place?<\/p>\n

Then I reminded myself: Arguing is a good thing.<\/p>\n

Why? Arguing is a sign that you care. You care enough to have strong opinions about how to make the company better. You\u2019re willing to bring those opinions forward, and battle it out for the best one.<\/p>\n

Arguing is how you vet ideas and ensure you\u2019re not submitting to groupthink. Arguing is how you make the best decisions.<\/p>\n

In his well-known book, Good to Great<\/a>, author Jim Collins echoes this sentiment:<\/p>\n

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\u201cAll the good-to-great companies had a penchant for intense dialogue. Phrases like \u2018loud debate,\u2019 \u2018heated discussions,\u2019 and \u2018healthy conflict\u2019 peppered the articles and interview transcripts from all the companies.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

The key is to argue well. To put forth your point not because you want your<\/em> point to win, but because you want the best<\/em> point to win. It\u2019s not about ego\u200a\u2014\u200ait\u2019s about the outcome. You want the outcome that\u2019s best for the company, plain and simple. It can\u2019t be about anything else.<\/p>\n

Whew, is this hard to do, let alone remember. When I\u2019m arguing with someone, it can feel negative and draining. My energy feels like it\u2019s just wasting away\u2026<\/p>\n

But then I remind myself that what\u2019s worse is the opposite: I don\u2019t want my team member agreeing with me all the time. I don\u2019t want him to stifle his thoughts or bite his tongue in exasperation. It\u2019d mean he\u2019d feel like it wasn\u2019t worth the effort to share his opinions. It\u2019d indicate he\u2019d given up and checked out.<\/p>\n

Constant agreement is a sign of apathy. When your team is agreeing with you all the time, it means someone doesn\u2019t care enough to bring her or his opinion forward. Someone doesn\u2019t care enough to challenge existing assumptions with a contrarian viewpoint, or to let you know that something is bugging them. She or he will just keep it inside\u2026and it\u2019ll fester, bubble up, and later explode.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s when you have a real<\/em> problem on your hands.<\/p>\n

Constant agreement is also an indicator of something deeper at play: fear and futility. If you find yourself in an echo chamber, it\u2019s often because your employees have grown to\u2026<\/p>\n

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  1. Fear<\/em> the repercussions of arguing with you. For instance, they\u2019re worried about being viewed as \u201cdifficult to work with,\u201d or even are scared about losing their job.<\/li>\n
  2. Feel it\u2019s futile<\/em> to speak up in the first place. If they were to argue with you, they believe you\u2019d simply brush their reasonings aside. So why\u2019d it be worth arguing, at all?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Fear and futility are in fact the top two reasons why employees don\u2019t speak up at work<\/a>. And so the lack of arguments could be pointing to broader malfunctions in your company where honest conversations are not happening as often as they should.<\/p>\n

    Pay attention to this. The absence of arguments should warn you that something more is brewing below the surface. Whether it\u2019s apathy, fear, or futility, you should be concerned if your employees are not<\/em> arguing with you\u2026 rather than the other way around.<\/p>\n

    I\u2019d much rather have an employee who argues with me, than an employee who nods their head, blindly agreeing with me. I\u2019m lucky that our team member was the former.<\/p>\n

    After all, you\u2019ll never avoid arguing. Arguing is a natural by-product of humans being humans. No two humans are 100% alike, so no two humans will ever 100% agree with one another. Put two people in a room and they will always end up arguing at some point.<\/p>\n

    Don\u2019t let an argument demoralize you. And don\u2019t succumb to the temptation to avoid it for the sake of saving perceived time and energy in the short term.<\/p>\n

    The conflict that comes with arguing is worth it. If you want the best ideas to surface and the best decisions to unfold, you have to be willing to face that friction. Embrace the arguing, and focus on doing it well.<\/p>\n\n\n

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