{"id":400,"date":"2018-01-03T03:31:11","date_gmt":"2018-01-03T03:31:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/danielvlopes238992071.wordpress.com\/2018\/01\/03\/want-to-improve-your-management-style-screw-the-golden-rule\/"},"modified":"2024-07-12T13:06:54","modified_gmt":"2024-07-12T20:06:54","slug":"want-to-improve-your-management-style-screw-the-golden-rule","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/canopy.is\/blog\/2018\/01\/03\/want-to-improve-your-management-style-screw-the-golden-rule\/","title":{"rendered":"Want to improve your management style? Screw the Golden Rule"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Here\u2019s why \u201cTreat others the way you want to be treated\u201d doesn\u2019t work as an effective leadership strategy.<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
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\u201cTreat others the way you\u2019d like to be treated.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

This is The Golden Rule we all learned growing up. As a manager or CEO in a company, you\u2019d think it would make sense to follow it too. Managers should treat their employees the way they\u2019d like to be treated, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not quite.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In an interview<\/a> I did with David Heinemeier Hansson<\/a> (DHH), the Creator of the popular web framework Ruby on Rails and Chief Technology Officer at Basecamp<\/a>, he shared this insight: You shouldn\u2019t treat other people the way you want to be treated because the other person isn\u2019t you<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The other person has different preferences (beliefs, ideas, and experiences) and is going to react to a situation differently than you. You might think something is reasonable or fair, but that\u2019s you<\/em> thinking that, not the other person. You cannot assume that the way she would like to be treated is the same as the way you\u2019d like to be treated.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

David admits to being guilty of this as much as anyone, saying that when he does this, \u201cI\u2019m trying to be empathetic to my own mirror image, which is not actually a very good definition of empathy.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In fact, it\u2019s self-centered in many ways to assume that if you treat others the way you\u2019d like to be treated, other people will like it too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One of the most memorable examples for me of this is when I talked with another CEO a few months ago. He told me how his company had implemented an unlimited vacation policy recently. In theory, he thought it was going to work great. It\u2019s what he<\/em> had always wanted when he\u2019d worked at other companies himself\u200a\u2014\u200aunlimited vacation, what could be better?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But then something interesting at his company happened: No one in his company took vacation. Maybe a day or two off here and there, but people took less vacation with the unlimited vacation policy than they had in years before.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was a little shocked when he first told me this. What went wrong? The CEO learned is that none of the employees wanted to be seen as \u201cthe slacker\u201d or \u201cletting the team down.\u201d Everyone else was afraid of taking vacation, so no one went on one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After realizing this, the CEO replaced the unlimited vacation policy with a requirement that people take at least two weeks off of paid vacation during a year. It\u2019s not what he<\/em> would have necessarily wanted, but that\u2019s not the point. If you\u2019re a great manager or leader, you shouldn\u2019t be operating from the point-of-view of what you want, you should be operating from the point-of-view of what others want.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Instead of practicing The Golden Rule and assuming other people are just like you, what should you do?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

The answer is deceptively simple. Ask.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ask your employees what type of vacation policy they\u2019d prefer or what work environment they\u2019d like to be in. Here are some examples of things you can specifically ask:<\/p>\n\n\n\n